It wasn't me who entered the new employee orientation only find an extra employee there and me being short a brochure. I never skim my emails to the point of missing the total number of people attending the meeting. It was not me who went to sit down in my chair to make my presentation only to miss the chair completely and kneeling so gracefully. It would not be my chair that rolled away from me. Nope not mine.
I didn't end up looking like I had botox injections after eating a Waldorf salad. I'm not the one who is allergic to cinnamon and walnuts but continued to down the Waldorf that was heaped with both walnuts and cinnamon apples. Some women pay top dollar for that shit and I do it out of stupidity and satisfying my taste buds. I work in a hospital---I'm just a flight away from the ED.
Not me! Monday.
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