Dear Baby E

Dear Baby E,

I just wanted to let you know that there hasn't been a day in past 4 weeks that I haven't thought about you or longed to see you. Since you went to heaven 4 weeks ago, my mood has centered around grieving for you. I hurt so bad knowing that I never got to see your fingernails or your eyes or get to take you for a ride in your stroller. I was so curious if you would have daddy's flat feet or mommy's narrow ones. You were a baby that wouldn't go without much. Daddy and I were already so well prepared for you. I'm so sorry you won't be able to be with us or use your cool things. I'm really sorry for Daddy and I because we were so excited to meet and watch you grow. My heart aches knowing that it will be what seems like forever for me to get to hold you. I guess we won't know when that will be---that's in God's timing. Which I might add, I didn't like his timing for you to back to him. Daddy and I bought a condo--God's blessing was perfect for that. You would be 11 weeks tomorrow. I miss you!

I love you Baby E!

Love always,
Mama

Here are photos of Baby E cool stuff:

CONDO UPDATE

I'm completely out of elbow grease for the weekend! I cleaned the condo from top to bottom and every last inch of the place! It's ready for us to move in. I'm going to make trips tomorrow with my car. Then I figure we will finish up next week or the weekend after with the bigger stuff. I'm really looking forward to moving in and finally settling down for a while. I will be so happy to have Mr. Walls back with us and getting him out of boarding. That will be a huge relief! Besides it will be ours in the end... how sweet that is.

Monster Mash Onesie

My newest idea for sewing projects. Monster onesies! This one is for my god baby Ryan for Halloween. I plan to make more and open up shop on Etsy.com in the next week. I've been sewing minky's, burp cloths and now my monster mash onesies. I think they are cute and a fun for kids if not more fun for the parents. Everything is either made on my sewing machine or with my two hands. The onesies are all hand stitched which I think is totally awesome!

Let me know if you are interested in particular colors or want to purchase one.

I got a fever....

Everyone warned me about the day that I would get hit with the fever.... the baby fever! I just laughed it off. I didn't take them seriously. Well, I've been struck in the head by something unknown. Every where I go there is always a baby sleeping in a stroller or an infant learning how to walk or nuclear family on the side walk. For those of you who don't use nuclear, it would be the so called "perfect family"---Perfect parents, perfect kids, perfect house with a picket fence. I have friends having babies, had babies, or like me struck in the head with the fever. I know its wrong to start preparing now for what you don't know if it will or will not happen in the future. But I see parents raising children ---its expensive... I just don't think you can be prepared enough so while baby shopping for my friend Linda's baby... I started picking up the basics for the non existent child in my life. I know, I know fucked up! Maybe tomorrow will be better.... maybe I will get the cooking fever at least Doc would be happy... he could get a day off from cooking the meals in the house :)